Motormouth 2

Motormouth ... damn ... he is the kind of fucktard you could write a whole blog about. In some ways he reminds of shit Koreans say. You just can't make the shit up. Yet it is hard to believe.

One day he was being himself. Which meant he never stopped talking as soon as he started his shift. Another  co-worker, lets call him Sarge, had a headache to start. MM was making it worse. At one one point Sarge asked him to please be quiet for just 5 minutes. Sarge was extremely polite. MM blew up. "I can fucking talk as much as I want to." Shit in that vein.

Later, MM was going on about how no one at work would hang out with him. Little wonder considering what he is like. Then he started in on Sarge. "You never hang with me homey." Sarge looked at him and said "I am twice your age. Why would I hang out with you?"

MM went on "You could hang out with me!" Sarge reiterated what he said  more vehemently. "I am twice your fucking age. Why the hell would I hang out with you? I have nieces and nephews your age and I don't hang out with them. I don't even like you. Why the fuck would I hang out with you?!?!?"

Motormouth just used that to go on a long rant. He continued on the vein of no one (co-workers) would hang out with him. Then he went off on a tangent about how his friends would rather be with their girlfriends than hang out with him.

(Sidebar: His friends introduced their girlfriends to him. The GF's couldn't stand him. Most people can't. Ergo they don't want to be around him. Ergo the friends want to be with their GF and don't hang out with him much any more.)

Motormouth ranted on about how he would rather spend time with his bros than hoes. "I want to spend time with guys! Women can fuck off. Just give me time with my bros."

Sarge had enough after 15 minutes of this. He looked MM in the eye with a smile and said "Motormouth, just turn gay. That is all you have to do. Then you can spend all your time with guys."

That sent Motormouth over the edge. He fucking lost it. "I'm not gay! I just prefer spending my time with guys! I prefer guys." It was hard not to break out laughing. He just didn't get that what he was saying contradicted what he wanted to say. That what he was saying was pretty fucking stupid. That he is an annoying git.

How Sarge kept a straight face and didn't piss himself laughing when he said that I don't know. I wanted to.

MM started having a bit of a breakdown after that. Making more mistakes than usual. Having temper tantrums like a kindergarten kid would have when he fucked up. Yet he is supposed to be an adult. He just isn't firing on all cylinders.